How to kiss: The Dos and Don’ts to puckering up

Have you ever really wanted to kiss your crush but your nerves got in the way? If you have had a bad experience kissing someone in the past, it may have affected your confidence in kissing today. As kissing is the gateway to becoming intimate with the person you want to get closer to, we’ve put together kissing tips for anyone who is feeling too shy or inexperienced to kiss their date.

Firstly, if you think you are a bad kisser, don’t worry too much about it! Feeling anxious over your kissing skills will only make the problem worse and secondly, we can reveal to you that being a bad kisser is really not a big deal! In a recent EliteSingles survey, only 4% of our members consider being a bad kisser a deal-breaker on a date, making it far less of an offence than any other behaviour traits which are usually deemed as a turn-off, such as being rude to the waiter or checking your phone constantly.

So, if being a bad kisser isn’t a big dating problem, why all the fuss over how to kiss? Well, confidence is sexy and being able to pucker up with pride is important; the more positive you feel about your kissing style, the more desirable you’ll feel. Follow these kissing tips to banish your nerves and boost your confidence in kissing.

Do prep your lips

No one wants to kiss someone with dry, flaky and chapped lips; buy some lip balm and apply before your date so your lips look smooth and smoochable.

Don’t ask for permission

You may think you’re being polite by asking beforehand if you can kiss your date, but it may be perceived that you are feeling nervous about initiating the kiss. Remember confidence is sexy; if you feel an urge to kiss your date, you should listen to your instincts and just go for it.

Don’t plunge into the kiss

However, try not shock your date with a surprise snog. There should be a gentle build up to the kiss; start with prolonged eye contact and then move to a subtle stroke on the arm or make your legs brush against each other. If you date responds well to this then you could lean in for a kiss.

READ MORE: Master the art of flirting – How to read your date’s body language

Do build passion

Start the kiss delicately and gradually become more passionate depending on the reaction of your date. It’s important to gauge how your date feels and what they are comfortable with before rushing into a full on snog.

Don’t lack enthusiasm

However, nothing’s going to turn someone off faster than kissing like a dead fish. Kissing is a game best played with two – so if you are into them, show some enthusiasm and let them know that you are into the kiss as well.

READ MORE: Expert advice from Dr. Justin Lehmiller: How to have a healthy sex life

Do use your tongue

How you use your tongue whilst kissing is mostly up to you, but there are some strict rules to follow. Sloppy and wet kisses are very unpleasant, so keep the tongue in the mouth. Don’t dart it around the mouth too quickly, instead move it calmly and smoothly. Don’t shove it to the back of your date’s throat, you don’t want to choke them! And remember to breathe!

Don’t bite (nibble a little instead)

If in doubt, it’s best to avoid using your teeth completely, you don’t want to cause your date any pain. However, many people like a small nibble on the lip as it can feel provocative and erotic. So, try with caution, if your date doesn’t like it, don’t do it again.

READ MORE: Looking for some first date tips – Here’s our best ones

Do give the face and neck some love too

Don’t forget to pay attention to other erogenous zones around the face as well as kissing on the lips. In the passion of the moment, you could delicately kiss behind the ear or on the neck. When you pull away at the end of the kiss, give your date a peck on the cheek, it will leave them wanting more.

Do use your hands

What you do with your hands can turn a good kiss into a great kiss. One hand behind the head and one on the waist is a safe bet, as most people do not mind being touched on those parts of the body whilst kissing. Pull your date in closer to you, but don’t grab! As with all aspects of the kiss, your hand movements should start softly and build to more passion.

Ultimately, you should develop your own personal kissing style so that you are confident and comfortable in puckering up. Our kissing tips are here to help you perfect your pout, after all, everyone kisses differently and that’s what makes kissing so exciting.

About the author: Esther Moriarty

Esther Moriarty is an editor for EliteSingles.

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