Finding a date suitable for a long-term relationship is not always an easy task. Taking the time to find somebody genuinely compatible, however, is the recipe for long-term happiness.
It’s a stage of the relationship every recently-single person is all too familiar with. You’ve gone out for coffee, spent an afternoon strolling round the town, had dinner at his place, and you’re beginning to know each other well. But how do you tell if he’s really ready for a serious relationship? How can you know if he sees you in the same way you’d like to see him? Judging these signs in the early days of a relationship is often a bit of a guessing game. That’s why we asked psychologist Sam Owen to share with us her top 5 giveaway signs that the person you’re dating is into you – seriously. 
1. Staying in or going out?
If it’s becoming easier to arrange dates with your partner – do they seem to prefer staying in or doing things with you? – it’s a clear sign they want to take things to the next level. That’s Sam’s first piece of advice for anyone in this position; if your date appears to be dropping plans with others or is always available to you, “this is a sign that they are more into your partnership than single life”. The test? Call your man after work on Friday and ask him out for a drink; if he doesn’t hesitate to drop his plans, you know you’re onto a winner!
Read more: Find true compatibility – how our personality test helps you
2. Privacy, what privacy?
In Sam’s words, “if your partner offers you things like a key to their house or their phone and social media passwords, you know they’re getting serious”. This might sound obvious, but if you’re constantly wondering “is he into me”, there’s little as comforting as being wholly welcomed into your partner’s life. Any residual qualms about them seeing someone else or not thinking about your relationship with the long-term in mind can subside. It’s a huge signal of intent if your partner starts to think of your relationship as a true partnership, where you want to share – not hide – everything between you. The trust involved suggests he considers you as a true partner in life, and has no interest in keeping you outside some aspect of his life. Another sure sign he’s into you is sharing his private concerns; take this as a sign he considers you a true friend and not just a lover. That’s the basis for a serious relationship.
3. Up close and personal
“If you’re included on occasions like family weddings or funerals, they’re ready to announce to the world that you’re a team”, says Sam. It’s fair to say that once you’re thought of – by the most important people in your partner’s life – as a natural companion on familial social events, you’re a major part of their life and they’re seriously into you. Schmoozing his parents? Spending nights or weekends with his close friends? Then it’s obvious they feel comfortable bringing you into their close, most private sphere, and happy sharing the good, the bad and the ugly. As Sam explains, “This is something we tend to reserve for those who we see a long-term commitment with”.
4. Acting on your hints
Successful relationships are about knowing when to compromise. A sure sign of whether he’s really into you is if you notice subtle changes in his behaviour, or becomes more accommodating with his lifestyle, in order to make you happy. This isn’t to say you’re interested in changing your partner, but it’s a classic sign they’re truly into you “if you tell him about your desires and dislikes and they take note and act upon them”. In Sam’s opinion, if your partner takes onboard your small hints, “they are showing that they care enough to try and build a future with you”.
5. Not only the good times count
If he’s really into you it’ll become all the more obvious when tougher times present themselves. It’s all well and good wining, dining, sitting hand in hand at the theatre or even spending a weekend with his closest friends. But a surer test of his long-term commitment is his willingness to support you during your low points. According to Sam, “Marriage, the ultimate commitment between lovers, is all about being there through ‘sickness and health’. If they are really present, then they see and want a long-term relationship with you”.
So now you know how to read him like a book. Fingers crossed it’s a happy ending!
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